Awards of the Day: June 18th

Player of the Day: Andrei Arshavin. Do you think Hiddink was just playing mind games by saying he might not start? Because if this is what he’s been showing in training, it was nothing more than a load of shit. This is not the same team that faced Spain. Dutch beware.

Team of the Tournament Spot Locked: Stepping up is Yuri Zhirkov, Russia’s hybrid LB/LW whose attacking runs from deep and passing have been a nightmare for opposing defenses. That sound you hear is Western Europe panting like dogs.

Harshest Sale of the Day: The Geneva store in the picture is giving 50% off the shirts of the less fortunate (or shitty, in some cases) teams in this tournament. Tough way to lose 50%, but hey, a little bit of consolation.

Retroactive Worst Bench Award: Portugal, since they were the only group winner that couldn’t win a game with their backups. Not that it matters or anything, just that it would’ve been a nice cherry on top of the sundae. No one wants a sundae without the cherry.

End of an Era Award: Henrik Larsson. His first tournament without scoring a goal. After all the hoopla regarding his shocking return, it looks like it was just a lot of bark and no bite. (Bet he would’ve scored with dreadlocks.)

This Ain’t Your Slightly Older Twin Brother’s Greece Award: 0-0-3. Four years was a LONG time ago, wasn’t it?

The Hoodoo of Hiddink Award: If Roman Abramovich wasn’t bankrolling him right now, what do you think oh, say, Roman Abramovich would pay to lure him out of Russia? The man’s just a walking, talking knockout round ticket. Get your bets in for 2010 now.

Get The Man Some Aspirin Award: Sergey Ignashevich for the early boot he took from Zlatan….and a fantastic boot at that.

Mourning: Matchup of the Day has been replaced with a moment of silence for the loss of Sweden. Sad day.