Some Hangover Remedies for Your Post-Post-Game Misery, From the People Who Love you at World Cup Blog

I’m not 100% sure, but judging by some of our comments I believe a fair number of you may be watching these games in places where alcoholic beverages are being served.

Comments like…oh, I don’t know…maybe this one?

IO AM SO DRUNK LOL JESUS CHRSIT IH ATE ARJEN ROBNBEN I WIL NEVER FORGIEVE HIM.
iots okyay beeacsue i hitnign im going to get laid. WOOO NETHERLANDS I LOVE UYOU! THIS GIRL IS SOTH OHOT!!!!!!AHAHAHAHA GROUP OD DEATH FOR LVIEFWE

That comment was followed by this one:

“There’s no way that guy is getting laid.”

And if the first commenter was you? Or if you think it could have been you? Fear not. We still love you. Most of us have probably been there. Well, maybe not there, exactly. But someplace similar. And this post was written for you.

This post is also for the guy who was in the bar with our very own Ian Rose watching Netherlands-France yesterday. He decided it was a good idea to take off one article of clothing for every goal scored. He wasn’t wearing socks, and Netherlands scored four goals. You do the math. I hear there were some scary moments at the end.

We at World Cup Blog do not recommend strip soccer in public places. (Although Ian and Chris have asked me to point out that there are occasional, situational exceptions for anyone who has modeled for Victoria’s Secret.) But should you wake up the morning after a post-game celebration or (post-game drowning of sorrows) with a vague recollection of having played the game despite our warning, this post is for you. Because here are some thoughts on dealing with hangovers.

First option: Do what the ancient Romans did. Eat deep-fried canaries. Forbes.com offers up this recipe:

Fried Canary
1 canary
1 pint cooking oil
Salt and pepper to taste

Grab the canary and with a large pair of scissors cut off its head. Make a small incision in the skin near the breast-bone; slip a finger inside, and deftly pull off the skin with all the feathers attached. Heat the oil until almost smoking, pop the bird in, undrawn, and deep-fry for two minutes. Remove from the oil, dust with salt and pepper and serve. (Some people recommend flambéing the canary with cognac immediately upon removing from the pan. This step is optional.)

Forbes also recommends the following. But probably not all at once: Black Velvet (champagne and Guinness); Bloody Mary; Borscht (yes, Borscht); Bullshot (vodka, bouillon, pepper, Worceestershire, lime); Hair of the Dog Cocktail (scotch, honey and double cream); Prairie oyster (raw egg, worcestershire, port, celery salt, pepper); or a Suffering Bastard (brandy, gin, Rose’s lime juice, bitters). Or, as a final possibility, “sleep, quiet darkness and time.”

What, none of those sound good? How about these, from the ultimate source, Wikipedia:

Rehydration, narcotics, exercise, oxygen, magnesium, Tolfenamic acid, vitamin B6, Chlormethiazole, Rosiglitazone, acetylcysteine, food and water, or milk, water and orange juice.

And if those don’t work? Wikipedia also has this to say:

A four page literature review in British Medical Journal on hangover cures by Max Pittler of the Peninsula Medical School at Exeter University and colleagues concludes: “No compelling evidence exists to suggest that any conventional or complementary intervention is effective for preventing or treating alcohol hangover. The most effective way to avoid the symptoms of alcohol induced hangover is to practice moderation.”

Moderation?!? Yeesh. How boring would our comments be if everybody followed that advice?