The Hotness Of Euro 2008 Is In Danger

Calvin Klein cannot be happy. Euro 2008 is going to be a prime opportunity to plaster Freddie Ljungberg’s thinly veiled junk all over the place and inspire men who do not belong in grape smugglers to buy grape smugglers and ruin locker room experiences all across Europe. However, with a cracked rib suffered against Newcastle today, the only place Freddie might show up is on billboards and magazine ads throughout the tournament, because his participation is now in doubt.

Before we get to the ladies and their fantasies, this is bad news for Sweden. The Blonde Ones can be a very good team on their day and have a more than respectable lineup, but they’re not exactly teeming over with depth and a no-show Freddie – or even a less than 100% Freddie – is bad news for the squad. And this is before we even get into the fact that he’s their captain and leader.

Sweden still has an assailable group in Spain, Russia and Greece, but unhappy times across the board for the Swedes with this one. Slightly good news is that Freddie might “walk through hell in a gasoline suit” to play in the Euros….

“I just have to play the opener. There is no other option. I will do everything possible to play at the European Championship.”

….yet I’m pretty sure he isn’t a doctor. (And if he is he’s the biggest overachiever in the history of ever, the bastard.) Still, inspirational words you love to hear from your captain.

Now for the ladies, well, less Freddie on the pitch means less eyecandy. Not that it’ll deter the serious fans, but I’ve met one of two who might tune in for a CK model alone – fashion tips and all that. Also bad for the guys because instead of being nagged into changing the channel, Freddie at least could’ve kept the significant other’s attention on occasion (”I know him from somewhere…..”). Uncool all around.

But at least all is not lost, we’ve still got Franck Ribery.